Dove Tailed
Where Learning and Experience Come Together
Dear friend,
I’m keeping the kettle busy today with mugs of hot tea. Zara is dozing on the dog bed and the kitchen clock is ticking away the afternoon. Jeremy will call in an hour or so and we’ll film a welcome video for people interested in coming to our London events.
The cloud cover is uneven, there are tears, where the light gets through. That a tear as in hair.
The rain has left patterns on the window glass and I can see finger grease where I’ve rested on the doors, looking out into the garden. Tell tale signs that some fairly large creatures inhabit this space.
There’s hoovering to be done, but I have the wonderful excuse of a sleeping dog, so I’ll maybe get round to it later when Katie comes to pick Zara up.
A couple of years ago, someone who’s known me since we were kids, made an observation.
“You seem so much happier these days. You were always looking for something, maybe now you’ve found it?”
When we’re trying to make something of ourselves. That’s when you confuse yourself with something that is incomplete and in need, you can’t but help trying to add things to you that will compensate for the lack.
You get good at stuff, mostly, on a good day, you’re working at things you enjoy for their own sake, but then again how often are we doing things to make ourselves seem more acceptable in our own eyes and in the eyes of others?
We’re trying to make something of our selves. Whatever we are now, needs improving. Many people, myself included, are living with the vague notion that something about us is wrong. We are somehow lacking, lack lustre or incomplete.
What more do we have to do to be complete?
To be accepted.
By the one from whom we most need it.
We can try and sometimes successfully we can gain acceptance from our family and friends, and from the other circles of community that mean something to us, but really what counts most is how we relate to ourselves.
Know thyself.
The famous script over the door of the temple at Delphi.
How odd to be searching for my self?
That which I am, how could that ever be separate from me?
All of those years of therapy and study.
Self help books.
Seminars.
Workshops.
Leading to the most ordinary realisation.
I am.
There’s nothing more to add.
It doesn’t bring about the end of the world, or the end of learning.
But the space after those two words.
Makes all the difference.
Till tomorrow
Love
Mikey